Two years ago today

For my first little angel Sparticus,
 I miss you a lot today and always, it was two years ago that i found out you were not going to be mine to hold. Even though i have your sister wriggling in me now,  there will always be a little bit of my heart that belongs just to you. A mothers love never forgets.
I will see and hold you one day my darling
mummy xxoo

untilted

I am now 30 weeks, and I am so grateful; to have made it this far. I hope the next 10 weeks are smooth sailing. My last midwife visit was good I passed the glucose test so no diabetes and my blood pressure is good. the only slightly negative thing is that Cookie hasn't turned yet. I know there is still time I just wonder whether the low placenta is preventing Cookie from turning. I have a scan at 34 weeks to check the placental position  to see if i can deliver naturally. so i haven't been standing on my head yet as there is probably not too much point trying to turn the baby before i am told that i can deliver naturally. I really don't want a C section though. so lots of prayers that the placenta has stretched out of the way and that Cookie is head down at the 34 week scan.

Tomorrow is 2 years since i lost our first angel, Sparticus and was plunged into a world of recurrent pregnancy loss. I truly hope that I am now leaving that dark place but i still get very anxious about anything going wrong from here in. I really hope that my arms are filled in august with the sleepy weight of a healthy newborn.  Some days i still find it hard to believe that Cookie is healthy and wriggling in my belly.